14th year house bound

[MockingJay]

I'm sorry to hear about your circumstances mate. Have you been diagnosed with a psychiatric disorder. I mean apart from the obvious agoraphobia? I'm new on this site too so I don't know if it's OK to ask Q's like that... It might b in your best interest to see a psych. It certainly helps me with my illness. My illness can't b cured but medication n a support network that are not my family has improved the quality of my life to b sure. You see at some point in our lives we have to take responsibility of what we've become n do something conducive to our own rescue n achieving good mental health since we will b the benefactors of the effort we put into achieving our sole objective toward gaining self acceptance. I am no philosopher by any stretch of the imagination...just someone who has been around for a time. 

[PeppiPatty]

Dear @MockingJay

Your message is very kind ......
My name is PeppiPatti ......
I've been on the forums for a little while ...... I always read this thread of Jacques and Hiddenite
They give each other support then when we say hi we are always welcome.

A great way to start is to do what @alex42 does and start your own thread or ...... Discussion
It becomes more ....... About your immediate needs. You will see all my threads ...... They are everywhere..... Probably not like me ...🍭🍧🍡🍱🍣🍘🍙🍧

[Jacques]

Haha, no i only burn it out the shed, mum would not be pleased if it was in the house, it is a fire hazard, so i go out the shed and when i am working out their in the afternoons, i lite one for you, sit their and just imagine what you look like, and hoping the calming smell somehow reaches you.

i love just sitting watching them too, they are mesmorizing, that probably helps with the calmness.

Karne you are not a laughing stock, many of us have safe places, yours is the car, mine is the shower, others have them too, they sound silly to others, but are our only safe refuge, try not to be too self consious about it Karen.

I know the world is scary to me too, that is why i vary rarly leave the house, i don't want to be part of the world anymore.  i just want to live my life out in solitude.

Good night my angel, my thoughts and wishes are with you always.

Sleep well my angel, may you only have pleasent dreams.

Jacques

[Jacques]

Hi @MockingJay, Welcome to the forums,

No i have never been formally diagnosed with anything, i have only had 1 30 min sessio nwith 2 psychiatrists, and never went back.

It is fine to ask me any question, i will answer as honestly as i can.

It is good you have a great support network, it does make all the difference, i am fairly isolated and don't have a close support network.  i have pushed everyone away, friends and family included.

You are right i do take full responsibility of not getting better, i have never really tried to get help, and have lost the will to do so, i am in tollerable state at the moment, and accept this as my future.

I Blame no one for my situation but me, many times i could have reached out for help but did not.  i have made some terrible choices in my past that will catch up to me in the future.

Thank you for you insights, it is much appreciated.

Take care

Jacques

[Jacques]

Hi My angel,

I hope you managed some rest last night.

Well today is a nicve sunny day, a little humid from the rain last night, but otherwise not bad.  Mrs Chook is singing away this morning, she sounds really happy, and the cattle are under the tree trying to get each other up, the flies are bugging them already, oh boy it would drive me mad having flies buzzing around me all day.

Mrs Magpie is waiting at the neighbours for her brekkie, but the neighbour has slept in, so the baby mag pies will have to wait for brekkie.

The frogs where singing all last night, it gave me great comfort.

I am tired and exhausted already and it is only 7:45am, wow it is going to be a long day, i am hoping to pull apart a desk that is in a bad way and replace it today, so i am hoping i can find the energy.

Well i hope your day goes ok, and your anxiety is not so bad with the men in the hospital.

My thoughts are with you my friend, be kind to yourself, you are a strong woman, kind, caring and loving.

Jacques

[Jacques]

Hi My angel,

Well i hope you are managing a quiet night, i hope the nurses are not making you too anxious, my thoughts are with you my angel.  

I lit another sandlewood insense stick for you, not much to report, the animals have had a quiet day, i put the head back onto the motomike, i will send a pic tomorrow.

Big hugs to you my friend, remember you are not alone, i am always here for you.

Take care, be safe my friend

Jacques

[hiddenite]

Hi Jacques sorry I haven't been around today. It's been so awful I'm left so overwhelmed. Knowing I can't do this anymore. It's just too difficult.

My thoughts are with you my friend

Karen

[hiddenite]

Thanks for your kind gift Jacques.

I wish I could give something to you

[Jacques]

Karen, you are doing so well being their, you have been strong to even go, i am so proud of you, i can only imagine how overwhelmed you are and how unsafe you must feel, please remember i am always here for you, you are not alone and you are not the only one with these feelings.

Karen i know things feel like they are never going to get better, please give it some time, i will support you in any way i can. just let me know what i can do to help.

I really missed you today, my thoughts have been with you all day.

i am here if you ant to talk or vent.

[hiddenite]

Thanks Jacques it just the enormous pressure I'm under here and I'm just supposed to manage. Everything has become too much I feel like I'm going to implode.

I'm so much better off just sitting in my car.

I miss you Jacques