Lived Experience Forum

[Olga]

So I underwent an extensive cognitive assessment today. Two and half hours of spacial, memory  and categorizing assessments to show if my bipolar disorder has turned my brain to mash. It turned out I didn't do too badly eventhough I found the exercises quite difficult. Has anyone else experienced cognitive problems and related them to their illness?

[petrichor]

Hi @Olga 

Well done for doing the assessment. I had various assessments over the years and even when I was at peak performance they were never easy. 2.5 hrs is huge!

I had a heap of blood works taken last time and also had brain scans. On one hand it's great that physicals came back ok, but accepting that this is how my brain now works... 

[Dimity]

@Olga that's a tough call imho.  I haven't had cognitive assessments but feel there'd be different answers whether objective logic or subjective judgement was in question. Intelligence knowledge and wisdom are all measures of how well we're (I'm?)  functioning and my judgement certainly has suffered when cresting a high or submerged in a downer. IQ is another matter and cognitive decline or lack of it used to be - maybe still is - a diagnostic criterion distinguishing different conditions. Wisdom? I can't resist quoting the prayer for courage to change the things we can, the serenity to accept the things we can't, and the wisdom to know the difference. 

IQ tests are notoriously sensitive to cultural bias and I once sat a US college entrance aptitude test that included questions about baseball. Neither my eyesight nor hearing is as good as it used to be so sensory input is also a factor these days in how well I perform. And then there's age.

Horses for courses probably sums up my attitude - first ask what the tests are measuring. If creativity, spontaneity and wit were included I'd have more faith in their ability to encapsulate how well we're coping with life while diagnosed as bipolar. I haven't heard of tests for compassion or a sense of humour but I admire them in forumites and aspire to more of them.

[Olga]

So true @ Dimity. It was all very onesided and no test on human virtues which are our core foundations. I always love the prayer on courage and wisdom you shared. Thank you

[greenpea]

@Olga  Hi Olga yes my brain is mash. I can no longer study let alone finish reading a book. My concentration span is hopeless. I feel for you and understand completely what your are saying. Love peaxxx

[CrazyChick]

@Olga

The cognitive assessments you had sound particularly exhausting. The other part of the exhaustion is the fear you have about the outcome.

I also had a battery of cognitive assessments done on me as part of a fitness to work assessment. My employers were trying to prove that because of my disability I was unable to do my job. I was very anxious about the testing and found it really challenging to do my best for the 5hrs of testing. I performed really well on the tests, but they still highlighted all the areas that I was weaker with - suggesting there was a problem with my average scores as they were below my other scores. Another test I had right at the end of the day, I guessed a lot as I was too tired and just wanted to go home.

Try to stay positive about the testing. Have you been tested previously for them to compare your current results to the past? Everyone has areas of weaknesses and that is ok. If they do believe that you are having cognitive decline then ask what you can do about it. Possibly changes to medications, or mental excercises such as crosswords.

I did see a show on SBS called How 'mad' are you? It included a participant Cameron who's mental illness is often associated with cognitive decline, but he had made efforts to offset this and did really well. Worth watching if you can.

Best of luck.

[Olga]

Hi @CrazyChick. Thank you for your input. My testing was also a fitness to work thing because my hospitalisation had to be reported eventhough I wasn't scheduled. Yes it was for me also quite nerve wrecking but I think if they see me unfit to do this job then it might be better not to do it. It sounds quite unfair what happened to you. Did you end up loosing the job?

[Olga]

Hi @CrazyChick, I just finished the documentory "how mad are you?" on SBS that you recommended and I absolutely loved it! So much food for thought. Thank you so much for pointing it out to me.