Friends, Family & Carers Forum

[Catlover328]

Hello, if anyone can provide assistance it would be much appreciated.

My sister was diagnosed with schizophrenia when she was roughly 21 she is now 27 years old with a 2 year old child. My parents are heavily involved in her child's care as she is an unfit mother. We were about to get case management when my sister cancelled the help. My parents and I are at a complete loss with her because we don't know how to help when she declines support. She struggles in every aspect of her life; sleeps 15 hours a day, no motivation, heavy delusions, doesn't believe her diagnosis, paranoia, child like silliness, doesn't eat well, no exercise, no social support and last of all things me and my parents are all against her and there is something wrong with us. I am in my final year of study and have been heavily affected by whats going on for the past 5 years, but i'm more worried about my parents who are only getting more stressed by the day and are ageing.

She has a private psychiatrist but tells her minimal of what is actually going on and as she is still breast feeding the dosage is so low it barely does anything, she refuses to see a psychologist and refuses to get admitted to the psychiatric ward. I am a psychology and social work student and my case formulation of her is that she is still quite deep in psychosis and is only deteriorating every day, i know the damage of untreated psychosis and it makes me scared she will have permanent damage if something isn't done. The only way i see her getting slightly better is if she was sectioned under a treatment order, but i don't know how that can happen if she refused to see anyone. It is obvious she is sacred to get help but she NEEDS IT and i seriously don't know what to do, any help or advice is much appreciated. 

[tyme]

Hi there @Catlover328 ,

You are voicing the concerns of many carers and loved ones. I hear how hard it is to get support for someone who is not acute enough to be in danger, yet not well enough to realise they are not well.

I hope others will speak of their experiences, because from what I've observed, there's little families can do if the individual is not willing to seek support.

I wonder if you can speak to her GP or doc? Would she permit someone to go with her?

I'm so sorry to hear you are in this predicament.

Please know you are certainly not alone.

[tyme]

Hey @Catlover328 ,

How are things going for you and your sister today?

We are thinking of you.

[defaultusername]

Hi @Catlover328,

Welcome to the Forum and thank you for sharing.

I'm very sorry to see that you're in such a difficult situation, I can only imagine how stressful it can be for you and your parents.

I agree with @tyme, it is so hard to be watching on as someone is in desperate need of help, but simply refuses any type of support. Particularly when they can't see what a strain they are putting on their loved ones.

Perhaps she would let you attend an appointment with her, so you can start to become more involved? As that may be a way to gently discuss the matter either with her or with her GP or psychiatrist.

I hope things get better for all of you, please know that we're all here for whenever you need to get things off of your chest, as you do have a lot on your shoulders right now.

Looking forward to hearing from you.

Be kind to yourself and take care,

defaultusername

[tyme]

How are things going for you today @Catlover328 ? Any changes for your sister? 

Thinking of you.

[Sue70]

Hi @Catlover328 

I am new on this forum and yours is one of the first posts I've read. It is very similar to my younger daughter's story who's 28 and has been diagnosed with schizophrenia / schizoaffective illness. The last 9 or so months have been an absolute nightmare as she had been going through a lengthy and full blown psychotic episode which she is finally coming out of and I am now having to navigate the post-psychosis period and the processing of everything that went on during this episode.

I feel your pain and anguish over the wellbeing of your sister and the stress of her being unwell is putting on your parents and yourself. It can be so difficult and emotionally draining for you all.

Thinking of my personal experience over the past 9 months, I have no suggestions to offer about how you could help your sister and encourage her to seek medical treatment. My daughter hit rock bottom before things finally started improving over the past few weeks. The most I could do was to be beside her the entire time and ensure I am there for her even when she refused my support and completely cut me off so I was not allowed to access information about her treatment while she was hospitalised. I think not giving up was the best thing and the only thing I could have done. The second thing which I think was very helpful was that I sought support and counselling for myself during the difficult times and took care of myself. I feel that having that self-care, as selfish as it may sound, equipped me to be better prepared for what she is currently going through.

It would be helpful for her mental health if she could cease breastfeeding and have her antipsychotic medications increased to help manage the psychosis. However, the decision is only hers and not something you have any control over.  Unfortunately, our legal system does not allow intervention without the consent of your loved one. I suspect that even if you had guardianship over her person, unless things escalate to the point where you end up at the emergency ward, there is nothing you could do to help. For illustration, my daughter walked out of the emergency ward even though she was already admitted for examination, so please ensure that you stick for as long as necessary. As bad as it sounds, the best thing would be if she gets admitted as an involuntary patient because it means that she would finally get a chance to receive medical treatment. 

I wish I could give you some more helpful suggestions, I really do. I hope that since you wrote your post, things have changed for the better and your sister is doing well.